Safe

with you.

He doesn’t know I’m writing this, but as I do, tears of happiness stream down my cheeks.

What is love?

It’s subjective for most but for me, love is safety.

For 33 years, especially from 2010–2024, I lived in fear of the man I once called “husband.” Holes punched into walls inches from my head. Marital rape. Verbal abuse. Eggshelled floors. I believed love meant staying small, invisible, and obedient.

I cooked, cleaned, and raised five children with a nervous system on fire. I didn’t sleep. I never relaxed. My body was in survival, constantly.

On the second day of therapy, my therapist asked how I even got out of bed every day.

I said: “From an early age, my dad told me the word ‘can’t’ doesn’t exist. So I just… do.”

I did. For 33 years, no boundaries, no breaks, no love. Just weight on my shoulders and fear in my bones.

And then, in January, as I was breaking, there was you.

Holding me together.

Three months later, you took my hand and flew me to Paris.

I doubted it because trauma told me no one could love me without a motive.

But you proved trauma wrong.

For 17 days, you loved me like I’ve only read in books or seen in movies.

You kissed my forehead like it could erase every scar.

You reached for my hand every moment.

You gasped when I walked out of the bathroom in my outfits.

You twirled me in the streets of Paris and Spain, even in the rain.

You stared at me like I was your favorite view.

You said “Good morning, beautiful” every single day.

No fights. No fear. No manipulation.

Only safety. Laughter. Kindness. Presence.

You made space for me to heal.

To breathe.

You listen. You protect. You feed me street food at midnight.

You worship the body I once felt ashamed of.

With you, the ground beneath me is solid.

Relationship anxiety is a memory.

You are my peace.

For 17 nights, you held me as my body softened out of survival mode.

No pressure. No expectations.

Just love, patience, and space to rediscover who I am.

So… what is love?

You are.

I luv u, K. ❤️

Forever thankful for this healing, love and desire filled trip I once only believed happened in fairytales.